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A New Mom’s Guide to Making Lactation Cookies

Day 1: Sit out a stick of butter to soften during the baby’s first nap of the day. Spend the rest of the day wishing that there was a second nap. When your husband asks why there is a stick of butter on the counter when he gets home, tell him you are going to make lactation cookies. Collapse into bed once the baby finally goes to sleep for the night, completely forgetting about the desire to make lactation cookies.

Day 2: Your butter has reached room temperature! The baby is sleeping! Put the butter in a bowl. Add sugar. Now the baby is awake after only sleeping for 20 minutes. No big deal, you’ll just wear the baby. Spend the next hour swaying from side to side in an attempt to get her to sleep. Ok, her eyes are closed and have been for a while. Maybe she is asleep. Spend the next few minutes trying to decide if the mixer would wake her up. Decide that it is not worth the risk. Keep the baby in the carrier, and go lie down on the couch with her. Don’t forget the remote because the powers that be now tell you that it is not safe to sleep with your baby on the couch. How on earth am I supposed to sleep when the baby sleeps again if she won’t let me put her down and it’s not safe to sleep with her?

Never mind. The baby didn’t like it when you sat down on the couch. She wants constant movement. Sweep the kitchen floor instead while the baby sleeps. Oh wait. That’s a typo. She screams. Not sleeps. Let’s try nursing.

While the baby is milk drunk to the point of being completely flaccid, you put her down in the swing. Slowly back away. She’s not fussing. She still appears asleep! You have a few minutes to yourself! Hurry back to the kitchen as quickly as you can quietly do so. Cream the butter and sugar together. Haphazardly measure out your other ingredients. Precision is not so important as speed. Get your dry ingredients mixed into the wet ones. If you still haven’t heard the baby, go ahead and preheat the oven. Spoon the dough onto the cookie sheets.

The oven dings that it is ready…and the baby says the same. Cookies or baby? Shove those bad boys into the oven and be sure you set your timer. If you’re lucky enough to have an auto-off feature on your oven, now would be an ideal time to use it.

Go comfort baby. Whew! You immediately smell what woke her up. Change the diaper. WASH YOUR HANDS! The timer is going off. Put baby in rock and play and hurry back to the kitchen with baby and rock and play. Get cookies out of the oven. Put the paci back in the baby’s mouth. Put a cookie in yours. Ahhhh! Chocolaty peanut buttery brewer’s yeasty goodness.

Try to make a moment to put the cookies away so that your husband doesn’t eat all of them upon his arrival home while you are at the grocery store with the (still screaming) baby. Wash the dishes sometime next week.

I don't do nice, well lit food photography. I have a newborn, and I'm not doing this for Pinterest pins. So there.

I don’t do nice, well lit food photography. I have a newborn, and I’m not doing this for Pinterest pins. So there.

This blog post was based on real life events. For my lactation cookie recipe, I used this whole wheat peanut butter oatmeal cookie recipe substituting a flax egg for the real egg and then adding 1 additional tablespoon of flax and 2 tablespoons of brewer’s yeast. Once I finally got them made, I was pretty pleased with the results. I’ve made the recipe as the other author has it written in her blog too, and they are some of my favorite cookies. Go ahead and give them a try. Happy baking!